Episode 11: Creating Goals We Don’t Believe Are Possible (Yet)

Join me this week as I chat about why I think we choose to do creative projects, why working on projects that stretch you is so very valuable, and a project that challenged me big time (and how I worked with it – and ended up creating something I didn’t believe I was ‘capable’ of doing).

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • Why we choose the projects we do
  • What you need to know about your worth
  • A big project I worked on last year that was a very different experience than past projects (because of these two topics)

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Let’s become a generation of creative women who are examples for the people in our lives of what it looks like to prioritize our work (AND recognize our impact).

x, Jen

Full episode transcript below:

 Welcome to today's episode, creating goals we don't believe are possible yet.  I have a slightly different view about why we take certain projects on. I don't think it's for achievement or even for what we think we'll get from making a project, which is often a financial goal or feelings of accomplishment. 

I have come to believe that we choose our projects and goals because we are looking to learn more about ourselves. And to evolve. 

 We humans are programmed to continue to grow, change, evolve, and know ourselves. The more I work with other humans, the more I see that we are all trying to understand ourselves better. And working on a project is an opportunity to know yourself better. 

Think about it. If we strip away all the to-dos and tasks, the project becomes something for us to respond to. It is something that brings up a lot, A LOT, of our self doubt, worries, and limitations for what we believe is possible for us and what we believe we are capable of. 

 This is actually great news because we have the opportunity to see and question it, rather than just living in it- the self doubt and the fears and the beliefs about our capability. Which we will do by default, we will live in that space by default.  

So we make our projects real things because we wanna see what it will become, and have it live in the world, and we make them because we get to learn about ourselves, and hopefully grow our self-concept. 

I wanna offer you something about your self- doubt. Your worth as a human is always intact and you are already complete. There is nothing you can do that will grow or detract from your worth. Nothing you accomplish. Or, nothing you don't do. I know that's like a double negative, but  nothing you don't do. I don't know, affects your worth. 

You are not more worthy for what you create and you're not less worthy for what you don't do. 

Let that sink in. What you do or don't  cannot affect your worth as a human. Your worth as a human is as intact the day you were born, as it is today.  

Understanding this very much matters because many of us spend our entire lives trying to achieve and accomplish so we can increase our worth. And it doesn't work. It is not a worthy pursuit of your time or energy, either. I would encourage you to take projects on because you wanna explore and grow your self concept. And you wanna explore your growth edges and learn more about yourself. And maybe transform what you believe is possible for you. Do it for those reasons, don't do it because you wanna be more worthy. Or more good or more legitimate. 

Let's talk about why this matters.  When you believe your worth is intact, the world will open up to you in new ways. You will create things you never thought possible. 

I'm going to share an example of this with you. An example of how the world opens up in a different way when we don't create for worthiness, but rather to grow our self-concept. 

 A little over a year ago, I created a single jewelry project that cost more than my first salary out of college, which was $36,000. And that is way back in 2008. 

So here's the story of this project. This jewelry project kind of just fell into my lap. And it required me to believe in my ability to create a majorly expansive project, and to figure it out one step at a time. It required me to stretch in a lot of new ways. 

During the months I worked on it, I just kept believing: I just need to do the next thing I have a hunch about, and I'll figure this out step by step. I don't need to know the whole how right now. I'm curious and excited to see how this project unfolds. 

A past version of me wouldn't have believed that was possible. I noticed many times these old scared voices would pipe up to encourage me to stop trying different things to make this project happen. 

Instead, I chose to trust myself and my experience to figure it out. And to stand up for myself in what is a very male dominated world- jewelry industry- super old school. Still. 

 Present me, who believes in my inherent worth and my ability to figure anything out, believed it was possible and problem solved and kept going. One step at a time. And tolerated  the very big discomfort that came up along the way  I didn't make the discomfort mean something was terribly wrong with me and I should quit. I knew it was normal and it, and I should expect it. And all I needed to do was keep trying my ideas and believing it would work. 

And it did work out. I made a gorgeous piece of jewelry that is now an heirloom for this family. And it was as meaningful for me as it was for them. It was just the most amazing experience for me to go through. Especially with all of the growth mindset that I have worked on over the past few years so that I could even recognize how different it was. 

So, to you, my creative friend, this is how anyone creates anything. They have a hunch, do the next thing they know to do, and take it step by step. That is all we ever need to know and do. 

The first step to having what you want is doing the work to believe it's possible for you. That often begins by discovering why you don't believe it's possible for you? 

The next step is knowing that you will create it for yourself, that the only thing you ever need to do is the thing you have a hunch about, take it one step at a time, and trust that you will get more information as you keep showing up. 

And the third step is one of my very favorite beliefs. Things happen and I'm on my own side, no matter what. 

So it sounds like, or the internal narrative sounds like: I try things, some work, some don't, I learn a little more each time, and I'm on my own side the whole way. 

What would be different for you if you believed that?  If that's what you would tell yourself as you were figuring something out. 

 I want you to keep believing in yourself and showing up for what you want and care about. Don't take anything personally. Ask: what is this here to teach me? Or, what can I learn from this? Take in any relevant information from those questions and then keep going. 

The world needs what you have to offer. And the brilliant ideas that you have. It matters. You matter, your ideas matter and your work matters. 

I am so glad you are here and that we get to walk our paths together. See you next time. Same time. Same place bye for now.

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